Time For Me

I have had my company for the evening over to share supper with me. She left a while ago and now I am having time for me. Not really a whole lot happened today. Just watched my recorded television programs for a while and decided, after my company to watch a recorded Doctor Who and then wash my hair so it will be ready to work with tomorrow morning before church, and then I can sleep in a bit and get the sleep I need to survive my three hours away from home after 8:30 a.m., and then come home to do what I want or need to do or both if it can be done. Bing is sleeping in the recliner right now and I am seriously thinking about going to my bedroom earlier than usual tonight and do some reading a little more than I am used to in a night or even a day. For the past couple of days or so now I have read a book titled “The Waiting Room” and I finished reading it earlier today. Good book for horror written in the 80’s. No nightmares thankfully. Now, I have, seriously, decided to read a book that was published in 1977 titled “The Messenger”. Sounds like a good book but haven’t started yet but I am hunkering to start it tonight. Hopefully no nightmares, lol.

I am seriously thinking of what I am going to do tomorrow after church but my plan is to do laundry on Monday sometime. I believe I have enough quarters to do a couple of loads anyway. Tomorrow is another day of just chilling out again. Have another fairly busy week this coming week, and I am looking forward to it to some point. Tomorrow begins a new week of something and I just have to grin and bear it for now.

Not much going on right now. I no longer have a big fan as the cord tore right in half where it was broken before because of stupid me tripped over it so now I have good reason to go to Wal-Mart and get a new fan with my graduation money I got from my parents, and I was seriously hoping to save it for something else in reality, but it is important for me to have a big fan to help with the circulating of air in my apartment. I have two small working fans, table fans, that work just fine to drown out any noise I wish not to hear or have rushing through my brain. I am fairly cool enough in my bedroom for once this summer — now I wonder why in the world I have decided to sleep out in the living room in the first beginning two years ago. Big mistake or the wrong kind of bed … who knows really. I surely don’t. God does, though. Anyway, I have my bedroom back to order, and I seem to always come back to that bedroom ordeal don’t I? Anyone sick of hearing about it yet? I am still in awe about my new sleeping arrangements and now I seriously think that I should not have changed my sleeping arrangements two years but did then. Oh well.

I really do not know what else to say or write about tonight. I am beginning to see that my diary entries are becoming long again but I can not really say if they are happy entries or not because I really do not take the time to read them after they are written but do read them as I wrote them the day of. i am glad to be feeling emotionally better and along with that, I have been keeping to myself these days and staying out of trouble where I live so I am not blamed for anything I did not do. Where I live today it has become to the point that when one thing is taken care of, another something pops up and problems brew among tenants and other people. I believe that this building has a hold of everyone to some point and it seems to be another soap opera situation after another as well. Life here has been carefully watched. I have two soap operas that I enjoy watching, when I have the chance, but don’t watch many of them because I feel that real life is a permanent soap opera in the reality of life. I just pretty much stay close to myself and have specific people at my place for certain reasons. I am living a real soap opera world right here. Not much more to say, really, or is there? Gossip and rumors hurt people and just never quits here and I have been a survivor of such being said and heard about me since I have lived here. I am not in the mood anymore to take crap from people, and my world is my private place today and always. I put up with guff more now than I have in the past.

The situation that happened on Tuesday night, the eve my friends left after spending two nights here, I had gone to bed and I was so tired and waiting for a beautiful day inside my own place, when I had gotten a phone call at midnight. That phone call disturbed me enough during the hour it was made that my sleep was deprived for a while, and I was glad that Wednesday was a no appointment or plans made day. On Thursday I was seriously thinking of telling my dad what happened but decided against it because it would have brought on a negative conversation between us both so not telling dad what was going on, was the best thing for me to do. Anyway, I did not have a lot of time with my dad, just a lunch date at Burger King, and a quick gab session before he had to leave for an appointment someplace. I was too excited, even though the time was very short, to see my father anyway. This past week has been an emotional, good, blessed week, even though Tuesday night could have ended better, sorry to say. I do not except phone calls after 10 p.m. anymore unless the person who is calling has been asked to call after 10 p.m.. Anyway, this person who was upset about not being invited to my graduation is pretty much over it now anyway. At least I truly hope so. I did not intend to hurt this person intentionally. That is not my heart and soul then, if you know what I am talking about.

This time for me is kind of cool if you ask me. It really brings out the ramblings in my head that can come rushing in. I sometimes do not make sense but then again this is my diary and I have been told many a time to write my feelings and get them out in the open, and I feel I have done so, also feeling that I have kept some of the feelings to myself for personal reason and not for gain. I better go for now and get ready for bed. I have a fairly big morning tomorrow and then I have an afternoon of what I need or want to do. Good night.

Author: ksmiley

As a diarist and blogger, please bear with me as I continue to upgrade my blog as time moves forward. Thank you.

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