A Rough Day

Yep, the title says it all. I did have a rough day. It is so because of what happened yesterday evening. What I wrote for February 28th (yesterday) was for a different incident that occurred over the past week after I had a friend over one Saturday evening. Something else happened yesterday evening when I had called a friend about a certain matter and then she tells me something that was told to her by another friend what I did and this other friend (not the one who I just called) did not come to me and tell me that i hurt her feelings over something I had said to her over the weekend. People do this to me ALL the time because they are so afraid of how I am going to react or what I will say back to them to defend for myself. It is sad … very sad. What hurts me most is people not coming directly to me about something that I had done, said, or looked right away. I am a big person who will apologize for what I did truthfully and go from there and learn from any mistake or error I have made in my yet young 39 (close to 40 years) life. I am not an ogre who will become mean and nasty and scream or punch someone’s lights out. It is like, I can not say or do anything for anyone without getting blamed for something, whether or not I did it. The past life I have lived has come to haunt me at times because of certain memories of incidences have plagued me to remind me of my past — the past that I can admit that I am not proud of today and wish that God would allow us to go back in time and do what is right by undoing a wrong, undoing what was said, and so on, but God has other plans for all of us.

About ksmiley

I feel I am back to journaling once again.
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