Hello & Good Morning, Can’t Get It Out of My Darn Head, Privacy Online Today: What’s Next

Can’t Get It Out of My Head

I am still remembering the fact that CSE was going to be here Sunday night but never showed up. She still has not come down here to explain herself with yet another lousy excuse so I have not hunted her down at all the past few days except tried to call her a couple of times yesterday and once this morning. I want to just scream at her for being such a big jerk of a friend and hiding away in her own damn world not caring about anyone here in the building anymore. I still believe that her living here at TM is yet a very big mistake and she needs to move elsewhere. She is ill and needs major help. I do not even know how many tears I have shed because of CSE anymore because I have lost count now. I believe the reason I keep bringing back what CSE has done that has been hurtful and mean is because of the fact that it hurts badly enough that my heart is breaking over and over again with her. I cannot trust her fully anymore and that is going to remain that way for the rest of our lives. I wish we never reconnected when she moved in here or even changed her name from CKR to CSE because that DOES NOT change the past she has lived unfortunately. I know her past has been bad but her new life is very complicated and I can not really be in it anymore in order to keep my sanity in check. She has to make some very serious changes in her CSE life but she has to be the one to do. I do care if she avoids me, I do care she pushes me aside for better friends, I do care that she hurts NMS even though NMS has made me very angry more than enough times. The last time she said something that was hurtful was when she was in the nursing home a couple of days before she came back home to stay – five weeks gone.

Please do not think that I enjoy the pain and hurt I have when it comes to CSE and NMS because I surely do not. I am a very kindhearted person who wants to give people chance after chance and help others out but it does have its toll on me too. I remember being upset when I went to bed at 9 pm Sunday night without CSE here or even ever showing up or have not yet come down with an explanation – lousy as they all have been. She has better friends now and throws me away for them EVERY TIME they show up or call. How sad and rude of her. Her brain is not wired right anymore. She is ill and needs help! I am sick and tired of sitting on the sidelines waiting for the little bitch now. It is over and it is going to stop now. She knows where I live and how to find me. No more will I ask her anymore favors from this day forward in order to just not to gt hurt. It even hurts me to plan this and follow through with it. I am in tears now because of it too. CSE is a scary person and needs to be avoided at all times.

Privacy Online Today: What’s Next\\

I love being on Facebook everyday every chance I have during the day. I love playing the games, conversing with friends and colleagues from high school, spreading the word about God through Bible verses, and seeing what other friends have posted who are on my list of friends. I have met some very interesting people and good people. I have deleted and blocked many people as well because of the lives they live are too dramatic and weird for me. I have had to walk away from friends in a physical sense as well and let them live their lives separately from mine in order to keep my sanity in check. I even tried calling a person last month to talk to her about something that was important to me and she hung up on me and had some friend of hers do her dirty work for her telling me she did not want to hear from me – the ball smashed into pieces once I threw it in her court. That told me that this person holds grudges and does not speak for herself when it comes to dramatic situations. Some people never grow up emotionally because they just can’t or won’t. Anyway… However, listening to Anderson yesterday and the news today, I have learned that we have to be very careful what we share and say on Facebook and Twitter now a days because jobs can be lost and prospective students may not get in the best colleges after high school. Yesterday, a teacher and a girl scout leader were fired from their jobs because of they said online on their Facebook and Twitter accounts. Sad that it has come to this. What is happening to our privacy online? It was never private. Even our phone calls are not private! People have gotten in trouble with the proper authorities for saying certain things over the phone between friends and family. That is why I do not talk about sex, politics, and religion on the internet. I will share Bible verses on Facebook and Twitter but won’t discuss such diverse subjects with other people much unless it is in the privacy of my own home that does not have cameras and some kind of recording device going. Privacy online has become scary for people today. People have taken their Facebook and Twitter accounts down because privacy can be invaded at any given time. There is always changes being made. What’s next?

Please be careful what you say online on Facebook and Twitter because your job and education can be at stake. I even heard of a husband who has just got talked to at work for something he wrote somewhere. It is getting down to the grit of things now. JUST BE CAREFUL! VERY CAREFUL. THIS IS NOT A JOKE!!!!