“Sometimes”

I do enjoy living here at Burbank Plaza most of the time but my apartment is so close to the community room – across the hall actually – and hearing the door open and close daily from morning until the room is closed at 10 PM I sometimes find it opening and closing often enough.  I sometimes must lock my apartment door so that I feel more secure than most of the time I am home – with someone or alone.  Sometimes I wish I had my own home to live in instead of an apartment complex but being on a fixed income and disabled/handicapped does not allow me to have some wonderful pleasures like a home of my own.  Many people live in apartments now-a-days because it is cheaper than owning your own home the way the economy has been the past several years.  I do miss living in a home with two or more bedrooms but I am happy here at Burbank Plaza most of the time. I keep to myself most of the time now anyway. Sometimes living in a close-knit community as Burbank Plaza can be nerving with sounds from other apartments, the hallway, and outside.  I see tenants come and go from the back-parking lot daily. Some tenants I like and others I do not like or care for too much.  My life is not different everyday as I have a scheduled day everyday – appointments, grocery shopping, church, showers, Bible study, and do what I enjoy most: watching TV, reading a good book, resting, cuddling with Bing Crosby the cat, journaling/writing, playing games on cell phone or computer, social media, and being myself.  Sometimes I need to be me whether someone likes me or not one day to the next. Sometimes people annoy me.  Sometimes I feel no one understands me. Sometimes I wonder why things happen the way they do that has nothing to do with my spiritual growth and beliefs.  Just sometimes I sometimes think about the word “sometimes” during the day I am from day to day.  I do have a lot of questions to ask God when I get to heaven.