Anxiety At Its Worst

Writing in a journal is strange because I have not written in a blog for so long.  Feb 10 to Feb 24 is a fourteen-day hiatus because I have had a rough month.  I will say that I will be glad that the month is almost over.  A patient at dialysis passed away on Feb 8, 2022, and she became a friend in the past two and half years.  JA died unexpectedly from a brain tumor.  I did not know that she had passed away until the social worker KG, came to me to tell me she had some sad news (JA passed away).   Before I was told, I thought that maybe she was not feeling well and not coming until Thursday.  Hearing that she passed away started a snowball rolling that has led me to have a rough month with anxiety that was so bad that I went to the ER in a snowstorm and back home.

The snowball effect lasted several days, and I ended up in the ER with insomnia and shallow breathing last week (the week of Feb 13 – 19, 2022), and sleep was non-existent for two and a half days.  It was an experience I hadn’t had in five years or so.  I have to admit that anxiety is an illness, and this illness does find me, and I don’t understand sometimes.

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As a diarist and blogger, please bear with me as I continue to upgrade my blog as time moves forward. Thank you.

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