6 p.m.

Not much is going on right now. I am talking to a friend on the phone right now. The last time I heard from her was a few months ago and she did try calling me last night but I did not return the call before late because I was busy being lazy and just did not want to call anyone. Right now I am listening to her talk telling me about her life these past few weeks. Wow…she is seeing someone again! Good for her! When I had gotten her call last night, out of the blue, I was yet a little shocked because remembering the last time I spoke to her she called several times a day which was very annoying. Tonight this call seems pleasant tonight.

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Where Did the Storm Go?

Okay, I am getting tired of the weather being different from what the weather man says every evening and morning. We were expecting a storm last night in the late night hours and we never got it! The heat is bad again today so I am staying indoors all day long. No plans of going out in it at all until tomorrow morning for church. The weather outdoors looks a little bit cloudy but not because of a storm about to brew but because of the overcast of the sky and heat. I am getting fed up with the weather man saying one thing and then something else happens. Am I the only person who is not too happy with the weather man? Probably not.

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Before the Storm

I thought I would write a quick entry before the night is out. Nothing much is going on right now. My day was great! I did not get together with my friend Mark because a project at his workplace had taken his time and he had to take a rain check on getting together for dinner but I did get together with my adopted Grandma who I call Nana for lunch out. We had a great time in the time we did have. We had arrived at the restaurant about 2:30 p.m. and before 3:40 p.m. we had realized that time was going by quickly. As I was paying for the dinner, my adopted Mom and friend G had come in to have dinner. During the time that Nana was eating her desert and drinking her ice water, “Mom”, G, and I were having a little bit of fun talking to each other silently as we mouthed what were saying from across the room. G and “Mom” were on one side of the room while Nana and I were on the other side. Before Nana and I left, G and “Mom” were getting really silly, making me silly on top of it, and before I knew it we were having butter pads and jelly pads thrown at each other. Thank goodness that there were people in the restaurant who understood that the four of us were “family” and enjoyed the little show. Honestly, I was having loads of fun and Nana was enjoying it as she sat and watched wondering what was going on. There were only the four of us, the waitresses and another couple in the restaurant at the time, thankfully. By the way, the throwing of pads of butter and jelly was “Mom’s idea and G was doing the throwing. I had only thrown one pad of jelly at G’s feet before we left. You probably don’t even believe me, right? What I did say here is true and believe me when I say I was having fun and definitely got caught up in the fun. THANKS “MOM”! I did have a good time – the short time we had together in the restaurant even though we were not sitting at the same table.

I personally think that I am now finally finished with the summer and what had come along with it – HEAT! I did have a great time in PA and I did see relatives from one end to the other and now the next thing is school coming in a few weeks…the end of August. I have been depressed long enough that today I realized how much fun I was having with my three friends. I had forgotten what fun was like there for a while I think. I am so glad that my depression episode is over and on the way out now that I have school to look forward to.

Today is my grandpa’s 90th b-day and knowing that he is in a nursing home with A;zhiemer’s sp? Disease in the infantile stages of life now. Remembering my grandpa then is better than now believe me. I know what he did all day long…ate, went potty in his pants (diapers), slept, and just lived another dull day in his mind. What a life my grandpa has to now live! Not a happy one I suppose not knowing what he is thinking or what is going on his mind altogether… I hope Mom and my stepfather went to see him today!

Well, I better go for now.

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

My Grandpa’s B-day

I have a grandpa who is in a nursing home in NM right now because of Alzhiemer’s Sp? Disease. Today Grandpa is 90 years old. Even though my grandpa does not remember from day to day anymore, I would like to wish him a Happy Birthday in my mind – knowing that it is his birthday and yet he is alive and living from day to day even though that dreadful disease has taken his mind.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Grandpa Clarence!

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Here Now Gone Later…

I thought that I would get online this late morning before the storm hits. Weare expecting a storm today and the sky does look gray and it is getting darker every minute it seems. I am NEVER on line during a storm but before and after one or more if there is enough time lapse inbetween storms and afterwards. Now, if it does storm later, are Mark and I going on the lake to fish this afternoon? I’m not! No way am I going to be on the water in a boat if we are haviing storm. Too risky and very dangerous. I doubt it that we are going finhing anyway. At least I hope not anyway. Hopefully Mark and I will get together anyway despite the foul weather. I do not know now when was the last time I have seen my buddy Mark and I do know it has been a fairly long time.

It is now 10 a.m. and I have been up since 8:45 a.m. At 8:45 a.m. when I got up I felt tired and wanted to go back to sleep but when I got myself moving and dressed I had moved myself more awake and now I am awake. I am wee bit tired yet but not like I was feeling at the hour I had gotten up. Not much is going on right now really. Just the television going on in the living room with an syndicate program “Murder, She Wrote” playing. I never looked up when the title of the show was sharing so I don’t know what the program is about. I do not remember either even though some of the actors do look familiar from other programs and movies.

I will be back tomorrow. Good bye for now. I hope this was not a boring read, lOL 😀

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

My Day Today

Today has been a very beautiful day. I had an appointment this morning with my DVR counselor about a block and a half away from my place at 10 a.m. When I left this morning, I had told my cat Emilee about what time I would be home and when I got home from my appointment I had gotten a scolding from my cat because I was late getting home! I was fifteen minutes late getting home and I had gotten an earful from my cat Emilee? Yes, I sure did. I think my cat can tell time, LOL

Today is my friend Mark’s 29th birthday and so I called him and had my Happy Birthday Smiley Guy sing him his Happy Birthday song and when I had gotten home I had gotten a call from him to have me call him back. I had asked him if he got his birthday surprise and he remarked saying that he definitely heard it and that I must really like that Birthday Smiley Guy and I told him yep!

Well, ever since I have been home from my appointment I have been home (indoors) all day resting and catnapping on my futon. I did not sleep well the night before so my sleep is getting caught up in the late afternoon yesterday and today and things seem to be caught up now. This is the first time I have been on line all day long. My first entry was my first entry all day long. I am not even sure if I am going to be online long today or tonight. I was so tired yesterday all day long that I had vowed I would go to bed early last night but because of the addiction to the Internet, getting to bed early last night did not happen. I had felt tired all day long that when I finally fell asleep, it was after midnight with my television still on! LOL I do not know if I will get to bed fairly early tonight either. That is still a big question for my night.

I will have to say good night once again. Good night!

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

A Dreamless Night

Alas, no bad dreams or nightmares remembered this morning! What a relief from dreams. I still don’t know what caused those dreams in the first place to all of a sudden surface. My adoptive Mom and I talked briefly about what could have caused the nightmares to happen and she did ask if I watched any television movies or programs that could have triggered the nightmares and I told her truthfully that no horror flicks were watched. I guess now that my nightmarish dreams are in the past and today I am nightmare or bad dream free. I am not going to even find out why my bad dreams surfaced now. They are over for the time being. Thank goodness! 😀

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Getting Back on Track…

Getting back on track here..FINALLY. I feel I have been so busy since summer began and I have been very busy. Now with the summer more than half over, I can not believe that I will be attending classes again this semester at the nearby college in about four weeks. July is now on its tail end for another year, and I can garauntee that July 2003 will not be the same as July 2002. As the years go grow older, things do change.

For the past two weeks I have been so moody and I am finally back on track with my emotions. No medications were taken during this emotional time and so I do have to admit that medication was questioned. I did have a time with a slight depression. And those nightmares I have been having…probably a way of releasing stress from all that had gone on in my life earlier this summer. In fact, the reason I remember those nightmarish dreams is because I am awakened from them and the dreams are vivid and in color and REMEMBERED! I tihnk now those dreams are over but I will wait and see when I am awakened by another nightmarish dream again…if tonight another dream pups into my life.

Last night I did not get to sleep until after 4 a.m. this morning for some reason. My mind was working on something that can not be explained and is not a conversation piece right now or ever. My body, being a person with cerebral palsy, was not relaxing at an early hour of the night and with the time being 8:28 p.m. now, my body is tired and sleep is going to be easy to find tonight. At least I hope so anyway…that is never a question or a possibility because sleep does get lost when i have troubles relaxing at night because of my cerebral palsy. I did have only five hours of sleep last night and I did take a two hour nap this afternoon with no phone calls or knocking at my door. No sounds were heard. Not one sound…a television, someone passing by my door to get to their apartment(s), not a phone call ringing, no noises from the outside was even heard. Everything was deathly quiet. I did wake up to the television still playing and I do remembering waking up to watch Judgge Judy but I had fallen back to sleep not hearing anything come from the television but waking up before the second show of Judge Judy about to air on television and falling back to sleep again waking up to the news. I had told myself to get up no matter how tired I was and the next thing I know I was on the internet checking for e-mail and writing in my thoughts here on the internet.

WHAT A DAY!

I have to go for now. More tomorrow if I find the time. Good night.

Posted in Uncategorized | 1 Comment

Feeling Better

Despite the nightmarish dreams I have been having, I am feeling better as far as emotions go. I feel that I am once again back to the world of the living. I would have said normal, but let’s define normal…no one is normal, are they? Don’t answer that question, please…no answers necessary. Thank you…

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Bad Dreams, Nightmares

Okay, when things start getting better for me emotionally this past Friday, I am been combatting bad dreams/nightmares since Saturday night. YIKES! Bad dreams and nightmares always get a negative rise out of me! If I described the nightmarish dreams, all I can say is this:

Dream 1 – Saturday night

A couple of friends and myself were coming up to a house and there was no steps to get inside. When I stood close to the house, the bottom of the door came up to my breasts.

Dream 2 – Sunday night

I was feeling captive in a house. All I could do, to escape whatever was after me was to go from room to room. You could enter one room and exit it by going into another room. The rooms were of a retangle shape, not real big. It was not the same house that I dreamt about the night before.

Dream 3 – Monday night

I was running away from something that was not friendly or a goodthing and everytime I would run into an obstacle, like a wall, I had to turn around and go another way to get away from this not friendly or good thing.

__________

I do have to admit that dreams do not make any sense but they do come from your subconcious mind. I have talked to a friend who told me that somewhere in my mind I am dealing with something that is an issue in my life. The three dreams I dreamt about did not make any sense and nothing very terrible were in them that I could really pick out to be a problem in my life. I have decided not to even deal with such dreams anymore – take stock into dreams. I know dreams are not always a figment of your imagination.

I do know that I have to avoid horror flicks so I do that.

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment