DH is making me an omelette with peppers and onions, cheese, and shredder 🦃 with two pieces of toast with cream cheese. Yummy for the tummy. JP will be here after 3 PM today. I wish she would would tell me, too, and not just the caregivers. Jeez!
Thanksgiving Day
Is it Thanksgiving Day already? Well, it is Thursday morning, and I am awake, but I am yet groggy. Yes, it is Thanksgiving Day. I do not have a turkey cooking in my oven this year. The fact is, I have not had a turkey cooking in my oven in my oven for years, since I have moved out, but one year while I lived at Garden Court, and had Thanksgiving dinner with a neighbor who happens to not be with us because he passed away at home the following year around Christmas. I remember his death to this day because his friendship meant a lie to me. I was at my Aunt JK’s the farm for Christmas that year. At that time, I learned or R’s death over the phone from NMS when we spoke on the phone. It was a big blow of my day on December 25th that year. With if being Thanksgiving Day today, JP is bringing me a plate to have later this afternoon. I could care either way. DH will be here by 10 AM after what the name of the event is is called the ‘turkey trot’. Her son TH is running’s in it. It goes by GC every year. It is 34 degrees outside. A little too chilly for me. I would participate in it with my power chair, and no, not like last year, I am not watching the event from my living room window today. I am not interested in it this year. JP said last week and this week she is going to participate in the ‘turkey trot with DH next year. Why does she have to be friends with her+ too. She and JM ruined my friendship relationship with JM by getting too close to JM shortly after they met. I think JP ruins friendships. JM and I are not close, and JM does not work for me anymore, and the last time I spoke to her until the other day was maybe three months ago. I still love her but I am very selective of telling her anything, and I no longer trust her. She will have to build her trust with me, but right now, I do not want her in my home with me alone with.no one else. Now, I may sound silly and mean, but when JP and JM were here together with me, they were too bubbly talking about things and when they talking about me in front of me, they did so as if I was a burden to them and that I needed to pull more of my weight to help them better than I have been. No one speaks to me like that, and no matter who said it first and agreed to leave if I fired JM, JP would leave, too. Absolutely unacceptable behavior among two caregivers working together. Now JM will work as needed and is backup. She still has a key and fob to get in, although, I wish she did not have them anymore to be very honest.
Since I am not really celebrating Thanksgiving today, the day where neighbors and friends, and family celebrate the holiday, I think it is just another ordinary day, and a reminder that I am not with friends for the day celebrating the day. I have nor celebrated Thanksgiving with friends since the Van Arsdale’s left to live in Arizona when he retired as the pastor here. It has been emotional for me since they left a few years ago. I was still living at Burbank Plaza when they left Wisconsin. Now, I am dealing with the blahs that come with anxiety and depression. Iris a reminder of being alone without being invited to celebrate something special during the year. Now you get it-I think. I would be thrilled if friends would invite me like the Van Ardale’s did while they lived in Janesville. Today is an ordinary day for me like usual.
I am watching the first season of Midsomer Murders on Tubi today. I am doing my best does not stay awake with my groggy stare of mind. Yep, I want to go back to sleep because of my Seroquel. Seriously! Maybe I will take a nap when DH comes and goes since JP will not be here until 2 and 3 PM with my Thanksgiving Day dinner. At least I will not be alone for the holiday. DH is on her way now at 8:45 AM! More thoughts later. I guess Tyler is done running. It is Tyler’s birthday, too, today. HAPPY BIRTHDAY TYLER!!! I hope he has a great day.
Please forgive me for sounding like a sourpuss right now. I am dealing with mixed emotions right now. Happy Thanksgiving, everyone. TTFN
just looked at my phone and found that 17.1.1 was a software update for phone and tablet. I have no problem updating my phone and tablet, but sometimes I have to wait until I have the time to do it. Today my WiFi is acting up a little bit, so I am doing what I can do with what I have at the moment in my day. At least my SpectrumSetup6-B is working right now. I am still unsure as to why my Roku box took a temporary dump on me that caused me to get so upset. 😠I will be okay as long as my Roku box does not take a break again. It was an emotional roller coaster ride for me to be on.
I am an Apple user, not Windows. It is not that I am not a Bill Gates fan because I was years ago. I became a Apple user a few years ago when my my stepfather LLL changed from Windows to Apple. Now, JP, my trustworthy caregiver does not like Apple products. She is an android user. Believe me, I have had my share of android products, too. I find the iPhone and iPad much easier to use and manage more than android. I do agree that Apple has its downside as well as Android. I get it. Anyway, today my phone and iPad want to upgrade to 17.1.1. It looks like my phone has updated and I am waiting for my iPad to finish updating to 17.1.1 now. I think all is good for now.
What a night of anxiety and emotions. My WiFi connection went wonky with my Roku box and this morning when DH handed me the remote for the Roku. box, it was not working properly, and the Roku box was acting like it was not working anymore. DH and I decided to unplug the Roku box from the strip it was plugged into. She found it, the Roku box not plugged in the strip securely as we thought. —It was loose and needed to be plugged in. We waited a moment to plug it back in, I hoped that the Roku box will reset and everything will work again. DH plugged the Roku box back into the strip and the box did reset itself. The box and the remote began to work together again, and I went to the settings on the box to find my WiFi connection. It finally worked and my Roku box is working again.
Honestly, at 8 AM, when things are not working for me and my anxiety was at a level, I could not control my emotions had the best of me for a while, the world had stopped moving in my life for a while or it seemed it did. If I do not have WiFi connection or a working Roku box, I feel lost and alone to the point that if I have no way to communicate with friends and family, I would be lost in electronic mayhem. Do you understand? I would feel lost anyway. My generation lives in cyberspace and social media. At least until my Roku box and remote were working again, I did have TV on my iPad to watch. It has been a very interesting morning that did begin last night. The afternoon will begin shortly.
An Evening Entry/Last Entry of the night
With this entry being the last one of the day and now being evening and past 10 PM a little bit, I need to say that I have had quite an evening at home with no caregiver here after 4 PM. I have been watching Midsomer Murders until my internet/Wi-Fi went out. I called Spectrum and got it fixed, but I could not set my Wi-Fi on my TV because the TV remote fell on the floor, and I hav to wait until DH gets here at 7:30 AM. Despite my anxiety being aroused this evening, my ears are finally cooling down. When anxiety creeps up my ears get warm but are cool to the touch. When Spectrum resolved my Wi-Fi issue within twenty minutes and hung up. The poor man thought I was yelling at him, but I was not. I was anxious and mad that the Roku remote fell on the floor. Now, I have to wait until DH gets here at 7:30 AM to get the remote off the floor. I will call Spectrum tomorrow morning and talk to someone to send the gentleman my sincere apology even though before he hung saying, ‘she was yelling at me’ to his co-workers around him. Yep, I heard the man say that before he disconnected the line. I, personally thought, the man was rude by saying something to hid co-workers, but I am okay with it now anyway. I am still going to call Spectrum in the morning and call him on his discretion being stupid at time. Yeah, he was being dumb.
With the Roku TV remote on the floor until DH gets here at 7:30 AM, I have uploaded Pluto TV and Tubi onto my laptop. I will fiddle with my Roku system in the morning. The Wi-Fi is now working with me being online on my phone and iPad. I am watching and listening to Midsomer Murders on Tubi right now since my Roku remote is on the floor underneath the table at this time. I have told you that I have had fine despite being at dialysis today and out the door by 2:55 PM ready to go home for the next two days for Thanksgiving Day on November 23, 2023, this year. At least the Wi-Fi works in my home again with SpectrumSetup-6B tonight.
With having to go to dialysis today on Tuesday morning, JP and I saw a large crowd of tenants in the lobby. The truth is one of the tenants said hi to JP because they saw her on the third-floor hallway from the ground floor because she was tall enough. I believe it was KH who said hi to JP. Anyway, we got to the ground floor and saw KW, JRS, KH, and a few others. JP recognized a neighbor and tried to help her remember how JP knew her. How sweet. This neighbor was new to me. I never saw her before. By 10:55 AM, my ride made herself known that she was outside. She was there for twenty minutes, and no one called to tell me. Anyway, JP and I did not join in on the big crowd of conversation this morning. When my ride arrived, we went outside and said our goodbyes and went our separate ways until 3 PM.
While JP has been nursing a headache all day, I was doing my best not to have an anxiety attack and have a crying spell at dialysis being dialyzed. Dr. A talked to all of his patients today, and when he got to me, I have to say I was happy ro see him to discuss my progress and last week’s labs. I am doing fine even though my potassium level was slightly elevated at 5.8, but that is not too bad. I had eaten some mashed potatoes a couple of days ago or three days ago. I also told him about the progress I was making at home and we no longer use the Hoyer or sling anymore. We still have the Hoyer and sling in case I have a fall while the caregivers are here. I am fine with my progress now. JP has plans for more progress of having more independence and do things on my own again.
JP’s Plans
Okay, I am fine with what JP is planning for my future at home. She wants to get rid of my old hospital bed and get my newer bed back in the living room so I will be closer to the bathroom in case I have to use the bathroom at night. I guess my dad and his wife SBK want to get me new furniture for the living room. I am excited to have my bed back in my bedroom myself, but with the holidays of Thanksgiving coming through New Years, I have to say that I want to get through and wait until until the first week of January 2024. I just want to survive the holidays and the switching the patients’ days at dialysis all around during the holiday season. I go back to dialysis tomorrow on Friday, and then have a Thanksgiving dinner with my parents on Saturday. I just want to get through the holidays right now. But JP has great plans I am going to work toward her goals for me as we plan to move back into the bedroom.
Okay, I have been home since a few minutes before 3:00 PM. Yep, I got out of clinic between 2:45-3:00 PM. I waited fifteen minutes to twenty minutes for JP get some things out of the way before putting me in bed for the rest of the afternoon and evening before she left for home herself. I had turkey and mashed potatoes and one slice of homemade pizza from yesterday’s supper. I had a little bit of turkey left over from my supper and saved it for an omelette for breakfast tomorrow morning when DH gets back to work in the morning because she was out of town taking care of her Dad’s health issue. Her Dad has been in the hospital because his heart was working in a strange way and his heart needed to be monitored for an overnight stay at the hospital. What the doctor decided to do was shock her dad’s heart back to normal rhythm because it was not beating normally. I felt for her dad and the family. DH will be back tomorrow morning. I just need to know what time 7:30 AM or 8 AM. Not hearing from her on the times I gave her kind of frustrates me. I need to have good communication with my caregivers. I do not like it when JP does not respond right away either. Why bother communicating with anyone who does not respond in a reasonable time—within minutes to an hour depending on the reason for communication is initiated in the first place. It is a pet peeve of mine. I did finally hear from DH, and she will be here at 7:30 AM tomorrow. I will not be seeing JP until Thursday afternoon because of her plans for dinner with her MIL tomorrow for their Thanksgiving dinner with no turkey this year. Whatever pleases people works for me, right? Right!
With this being another play-by-play sort of day, I am glad I am almost done. In order to pass the time, I am reading James Patterson’s book, but decided to take a little break to give an update. I am excited to be almost done for the day and get back on schedule on Friday until the week of Christmas. I can see JM’x reasoning about throwing all the patients’ schedule off just because of Thanksgiving Day, Christmas and New Years. JP is right that it causes me some anxiety and unnecessary worry about who is coming to take ca re of me in the morning and get me out of my apartment to go downstairs in the morning to wait for my medical ride to and from.
Now, seriously, I have just started to get on the scale walking onto the scale last week. JP has me walking at home when we transfer from power chair, to bed, and my recliner, and walking to use the bathroom on a daily basis now. That is a good feeling, but I still have my days where I feel I will not make it to and from the bathroom because I am sometimes unsteady and my equilibrium is slightly off. Odd, right? Maybe, sometimes to be very honest with you. I still have my doubts at times, and I need to have more confidence in my progress to this day. I need to go and allow a cramp on my left side by my hip and where my left kidney was a long time again.my left kidney was gone by the time I reached age seventeen. I learned by an ultrasound test that my right kidney was still there but very small, and blood tests showed it was functioning at 4%, and only kidney needs to function normally at 25% before a kidney transplant is necessary, and by age seventeen was when I had the need for dialysis and a kidney transplant. It was the biggest surgery I have had in my lifetime. With a short time left, I am going to rest and take it easy so I can get ready to walk and get in my power chair, get on the scale walking onto it. Because I am a little bit slow getting on and off the scale, I want my strength not to fail me. Anyway, my weight was not bad, and the machine is taking 1.5 kilograms of fluid out of me, I just want to take it easy now. I am also going to see where I left off reading and get back to it when I get into bed at home this afternoon. Goodbye for now and more later when dinner is done and I have rested for the rest of the afternoon. Tada for now—TTFN.
while waiting for my turn to get on the scale and be tethered to a dialysis machine, my name was called by one of my favorite technicians named T (female). We got to the scale and we got on slowly as I just started walking to get on the scale last week here at dialysis for the first time in a year and a half since I lost my legs to a hematoma last September. I have working on walking again at physical therapy last year before December. According to my therapists, I have come a long way from the beginning to the end of my therapy sessions this past Wednesday. I stopped therapy with my therapist’s blessing (BL’s) on Monday last week. Now JP wants Dr. M, CP specialist to get an order in for Occupational Therapy when I see her in December. All good for now.
Well, anyway, I have got weighed am I at 80.8 coming in. We get to chair #18, my spot, and get me hooked by 11:50 AM. I have one hour and three minutes left to dialyze before I am done foe the day and two days.
At the moment, I am not alone, but patient is heading back to room now. My friend R is here now, so I am not entirely the only patient waiting for their turn now. F (male) just got rolled back to dialysis room. I have Sid my hellos to other patients who have gone into the clinic for their treatment. My friend P (female) did not make it to clinic on Sunday. She did not went to come on Sunday. I did not yell at her, but I did say it would be best for her to get cleaned three times a week would be best. She just poo pooed it off. Ok, that was one particular person who does take dialysis as serious as they should. Nothing I can do about it. I just know one person at dialysis now who does not caee.
