Afterthoughts about JT

I really do not care if anyone, any of JT’s friends run across the journal entry or not, but my feelings right now have to be written since I am somethinig on my mind about JT. Remember the neighbor woman I was telling you all about in an entry a couple of days ago or so? Well, my feelings for her are still gone and in no more room for her in my life. Yesterday, when I was with my friend Jimmy (Kelly’s husband) in the afternoon, I saw her more than once and could not figure out if I was either boiling with anger about her or my blood ran cold like a well air condiitoned apartment or freezer so I decided that, giving it some thought, that I had both feelings. She had hurt my friends for the last and final time. The cops were involved this weekend and they told my friends that if there was another disturbance between JT and them, they would all be ticketed for disturbance, which I found rather odd and kind of stupid, but after giving it some thought, it was understanadable. the cops or any authority figure of any kind are NOT babysitters. The law needs to have its most important issues to take care of and disturbances like this past weekend is not of great importance. I could, because I am a retired policeman’s daughter myself, see where the police department would do what they do in most cases such as domestic disturbances. Even more, I was red hot and angered at the thought that JT would treat anyone the way she did like she did. It was disappointing to find a foe instead of a friend!!

Anyway, as much as I can even remember being around JT, I can pretty much say that everytime Kelly was not home but someone was at her place visiting with her husband Jimmy, who cannot be left alone for reasons of his Down Syndrome, when JT was ever visiting, JT was the instigator of all that happened by yelling and screaming and fighting with the people who have been with Jimmy. With Jimmy’s physical health, fighting always bothered him emotionally and physically. Jimmy, a sweet man as he is, does not have to deal with such behavior from anyone – friend or foe (LOL) at any given time. Also, to be very honest with you, I had read two e-mails that Kelly had from our friend Janessa had given her to look at and dispose of after a while. I was digusted and not happy at all about the e-mail that JT had written to Janessa. It was filled with lies and so much deceit that it made my sick and want to throw up, and the blood in my body had begun to boil with anger. I was very angry. I had read the e-mail that Janessa had written to her boyfriend – a friend of ours as well – and all I saw was an innocence that put my boiled blood back down to 98.6 degrees (LOL). I have known Janessa for a long time and our friendship has been very good and getting stronger everyday. She would not ever say the things that JT said Janessa said or did. To grab the conclusion of all that happened this weekend, it boiled down to JT’s jealousy of Janessa and her boyfriend dating because JT likes Chad so much and so forth (more so telling Chad to do this and do that and do what she wanted – not him), and JT was always jealous of Kelly’s friends because JT was never included in group activities like she wanted.

I had spent the afternoon and early evening with Jimmy yesterday upon request by Kelly so I did that for her and I WANTED to get out of my own place for a while anyway. From my observing JT while running into her in passing (she did not know it was me because she is visually impaired) she now has made friends among other tenants, older or elderly, just as quickly as she comes and goes anywhere in one’s life. I, making another observation in my own mind and sight, no one seems to care about her but tolerate her because she is so bossy and immature in dealing with things in her life. JT almost —- excuse me — does scare me and my other friends a lot because of her bossiness and how she acts. Excuse me again, but these words have to be said. I HATE her with the worst hate passion right now for some reason unexplained right now. I need to go on with my life and it will never include JT as long as JT is in this town or anywhere in this world. May God help her realize that she is the way she is but then I realize that she needs to help herself first.

I do not deny my feelings about JT being harsh and somewhat unjustifiable, but when someone puts the blame on others and not accepting or taking blame as well, drives me crazy most of the time. JT was like that and it drove me crazy all the time. She (JT) painted such an ugly picture of herself to me that I can not explain in words without getting heated in thought and mind again. I have, however, run into people like JT a lot in my years as an adult, but those people were dismissed out of my life and never heard from again. JT has ruined things now and she will not be heard from again. I do not want anything to do with her anymore and in reality can not do anything with her anymore. I do not want to have the police knocking at my door because she called the police on me for evn associating with her in any way possible. It disgusts ME! And here I am a Christian woman with a heart that does not feel for someone like JT anymore? Are my feelings justified? I hope so in all reality! YIKES!

About ksmiley

I feel I am back to journaling once again.
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