Have I Been Overthinking Again, LOL

Okay… I am so glad I have a job to in the near future to go to – July – because I feel I have been thinking about some things again and now I am wondering IF I have been overthinking about some things again. I was talking to my caseworker at Catholic Charities again today – TG – and I do have to admit that this medical ride thing to appointments has become a tad bit complicated in my way of thinking. What is happening, because of the government, has become so complicated in my way of thinking. The feeling of confusion has washed over me to the point I am beginning to find myself running in every direction. TG is going to send me emails to have me look over and study, do some research on to see what I can come up with in my own understanding and get on the same page as TG. What the government is doing is confusing even though I do not have a bad thing to say about the government.

I have had CSE over during the supper hour until 1130 pm and then she left and I went to bed. Her computer is all screwed up now to the point that I now believe she has done something to it or the company Toshiba has a defective computer on CSE’s hands. She can not and for the life of me figure out why, get online via the internet now for the past three days. She has been having so much trouble with the computer lately and I have a feeling the operator of the computer is the problem. I still have this feeling that when she bought her computer and could not pay rent for two months has caught up with her and I believe she is not to have a computer right now. She has acted very selfishly about the computer not thinking that it would affect her world and the people around her as much as it did. I do not have good reviews about Toshiba lately. As for me, I have not had ANY problems with my windows 7 laptop and I have had it a year this summer now. No problems whatsoever. All CSE has been having lately with her windows 7 laptop is nothing but problems. Now, I am hoping, in reality, she will get her own internet provider now and stop using my protected wireless router real soon. If she gets a new laptop this summer because this one is not working right for her, it is NOT allowed in my home whatsoever. I will then change my protected wireless network password and not allow her to have it because I know for a fact her computer will bring more problems and affect others around her. Now I know, truly, that what CSE does is not my problem and I should not worry about what happens to her if she is unable to do something such as not paying rent for two months and having to make payments to catch up on her rent but to me, when she brought her laptop into my home the first day, I knew there were problems in the background. CSE has NOT been making wise choices these days. That is my observation of her lately anyway. I love her so much but she is not a true friend of mine like JSL is in my way of thinking. Yes, CSE does a lot for me and Bing and has helped me through some major health issues regarding my anxiety but for some reason she has been lying and hiding things from me and our surrogate mother lately, and I do not like being friends with liars and cheaters, and CSE has been lying to me everyday lately. I HATE THAT! I have no idea what her problem is. Why can she NOT tell me the DAMN truth!!!!!!!!! I am still a bit bothered by her outburst about Christianity and God yet. Really bothered. She really pissed me off on that subject matter.

I have been thinking about my brother and his wife in PA lately and have run into pictures of the kids and family and threw them all out. They have really lost their place in my heart these days to the point they are ALL dead to me now and I will only pray for them but they are not welcome in my life anymore whatsoever. My brother’s wife is very ill mentally and needs help but denies any mental illness is in her family. She is an abuser and someone who needs help big time. I have no involvement with the PA family anymore. They have destroyed the family all because of my brother’s wife’s lies. After running into a picture of my nephew RK, I threw it away in the garbage where it belongs because he is garbage himself. They have hurt my dad so badly that dad will one day go to his grave never speaking to his son, my brother, ever again. What jackasses they are! Sick if you ask me is more like them. AARRGG!!!

See… I have been overthinking!!!!! DANG!!!!!

Author: ksmiley

As a diarist and blogger, please bear with me as I continue to upgrade my blog as time moves forward. Thank you.

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