Despite My Day

Despite how my day has been – CSE’s as well – I do believe that I am going to make the best of Christmas Eve the rest of the day and go from there. DB will be here in a couple of hours or so now to help me with my shower and then I will watch more TV and go from there – I am done a lot of venting and bickering all day long today – enough is enough. I am not feeling very good right now emotionally and have a dratted anxiety headache trying to plague my body, and so forth. I even have my monthly and that is not helping me at this time either. I am so frustrated and wanting to cry again – glad to be getting out of the building for a little while tomorrow and I am looking so forward to it more now today than ever but was not too sure about it several hours ago before CSE and I had a little tiff between one another. I am so frustrated and lost in my own world AGAIN! I do not what to do with CSE anymore – I am totally confused, lost, and very hurt, and not sure if I can even continue having CSE in my world now – we do not have anything in common anymore – CSE is someone I do not even know or even care to know right now.

So please forgive me for writing about my grievances over and over regarding my neighbor CSE lately and still not doing anything. I know and understand that it is a constant issue I need to work out myself and go from there. I am just getting frustrated and need to walk away from things for a while when it comes to CSE and I, and resume things on a later date/day. My world has been rocky and confusing me all year so I will be glad to see 2011 gone.

About ksmiley

I feel I am back to journaling once again.
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