Since it is fresh on my mind this morning, I thought I would write something about 9/11 even though it is a day early. FOr the longest time I have been wanting to write something about 9/11 anyway even though I have in the past some time ago. My stepfather read what I had written last time and I got a repot back from him that practically put me in tears – as if my feelings about what happened did not matter to him and that I should have been over the attack by that time! That really hurt me even more than a friend breaking plans all the time. Now that a year has passed, 9/11 has an anniversaryy now. the “Attack on America” has affected everyone differently. I did not lose anyone in the attack but my heart felt the ache of those who did. How could someone, like Bin Laden (Sp?), hate so much? How I feel about this is this: We have our own terrors and problems in this country that someone out of the country causes terror makes it even more worse for our nation. Do I seem angry? Maybe I am and yet I haven’t been able to disclose it and let it go and ride it off, but our country was attacked! A year has gone by now and seeing and hearing the news on a daily basis, my heart just makes a sickening thump in my body. My throat has a kump now and then forming to where I can not swallow what is there and I choke. I feel so sick that I even look sick. What happened to this nation a year ago makes my little insecurities and fears so small like little itty bitty ants. I do not know how much I have cried in the past year in regards to the attack on our nation. Now my stepfather’s remark about letting go the attack and live my life the way I have lived it before seems so petty and hateful as well. I do have feelings you know. Have I calmed down yet? 🙂 I know it is not a laughing matter. I am not laughing…
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I need to finish my thoughts later. My cleaning lady is hear and she is now running the vacuum cleaner and I can not even hear myself think – let alone keep what is on my mind from getting all cluttered up with the noise of the vacuum cleaner, LOL. Now that is funny! More on my thoughts later.
