It Never Ends!

I thought yesterday was the end of the pain of what this man did to me, but he called from a payphone today three times. I did not give him the satisfaction of talking to me when he did call a second and third time. He called from a payohone saying he was his cousin and he wanted him to tell me that he was dating someone else. What a jerk. I knew right away that it was truly the so-called idiot who claimed he was dating me to everyone he knew without allowing me to have the opportunity to say anything to anyone — not a one. When he called the second and third time I picked up the call and immediately hung up on him giving him the satisfaction of losing fifty cents twice – a whole dollar – for even calling me in the first place. What a JERK! The pain is back and my heart feels like it has been ripped out and stomped on and thrown away in the garbage which I believe is not my place. Why do men have to be such jerks to me or even use me in a respect that is horrible and cruel to me. I do not know if I can trust a man right now outside my best friend Mark who told me yesterday would never treat me like dirt and that we will be friends forever. The thought of losing Mark right now would be a devastating blow to my mind and heart. I am glad he is here for me now. Why do men have to treat me like dirt? I do not want to get in a serious relationship with a man right away and it seems that every man I have ever dated, except for the first boyfriend I had in high school, have to have one thing in mind and wanting to cuddle and so forth? I do not like to cuddle all the time. Men are jerks and I am wondering now if I am just supposed to be single but I do not know what God has in store for me yet. I just always seem to get burned for some reason. The pain my heart is back and that is no thanks to NV who is nothing but a man who jumps from one woman to the next to get is satisfaction of sex. I hate sex! It causes problems to people like me. I am hurting very very badly!

Author: ksmiley

As a diarist and blogger, please bear with me as I continue to upgrade my blog as time moves forward. Thank you.

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