Strangely, I Thought of Something and For Some Reason, I CAN’T Get It Off My Mind

It is late and I am usually in bed by this time and believe me, I have thought of something and can not get it out of my mind. In other words I am beating myself up about this thought too. It WON’T go away whatsoever, so here I am writing about it in order to get it off my chest before going to bed.

The other day, I believe it was Friday afternoon, I had spoken to my dad about what was going on in my life, my future as a person and the career being an Accountant after I get my degree in school. As we were talking, both Dad and I allowed each other to talk and speak our mind and thoughts. For the first time in a long time I have allowed my dad not to bother me about this or that in my life. I know now he is very supportive and very loving. I never thought of him unloving, but surely enough that is not the problem or will ever be. Anyway, what I am beating myself up about is the fact that I wish my mom and I could have serious talks over the phone more often than what we have had so far in my life – in her life as well. My dad seems to take an interest in my life more so than my own Mom and that scares me a bit. I want to have a closer relationship with my mom but she needs to be responsible for her half. I do love my mother and I know she loves me. She gave me a kidney seventeen years ago and she birthed me thirty-five years ago. Come on! I want a closer relationship with my mom.