08.18.09

Today, being Wednesday, I had awakened to sunshine for a while and then it got cloudy not too long afterward. Ewww! It is going to rain and 50% chance of thunderstorm in the late afternoon and evening. We have had a lot of rain here now in the past three weeks that has been unwanted by many people but the world outside needs it. I am against and for rain for the most part because physical pain comes running about during days like this. Anyway, I had awakened late today. Slept until 11:30 a.m. this morning — my lazy bottom just would not get out of bed this morning early today. Sleeping late felt real good today. I needed the rest. I needed the sleep. I needed the time in lala land for a while. I will be okay. I am feeling a little less lost losing my best friend DC last Thursday in a car accident. Tomorrow, thinking about it, will be a week since his death. Yes, I am still having difficulty with the idea that DC is gone and I do not know when I will be over the loss completely. I miss DC very much and now when I go on IDS fun activities, I will never see DC again because he is now gone physically from this earth. I still do not know what to think about his death yet. A piece of me died along with DC when he died. The news still rings a shock to me from Friday morning when I had received the phone call at 8:30 a.m. that morning. I had talked to LB yesterday while she came by to help me clean, telling her that it was a shock to me getting that phone call from her Friday morning and she in turn told me that it was a shock to everyone who knew DC well. Am I ever going to get past this? Am I harboring some emotion that is hidden about DC’s death? I have not figured it all out yet and I am not pressing my mind into finding out right away either. I need to time to mourn.

I have a neighbor who I think has her man-friend so far up her butt that when I asked her if she could do me favor when I had awakened, she acted like going downstairs, coming back upstairs, and going back downstairs was such a horrible chore. I have asked the wrong person to do me a certain favor apparently. The iun-Christian part of me thought how lazy my neighbor was and that I will never do anymore favors for her until she gets the idea that doing favors will get through her thick skull. The Christian part of me said okay, when I am able to leave my apartment later in the afternoon, I will get what I needed by myself. Some people, like this neighbor has proven, are so lazy that it drives me bananas at times to the point of dissolving what I had left of ever knowing this neighbor. I hardly ever hear from her anymore anyway. Why bother with this neighbor now anyway. I have my own life to live and not everyone needs to be in my inner circle anymore anyway. I have me to worry about and I am not going to wate my breath on those who act like idiots anymore either. I do not know what to think sometimes. I will be okay.

I am going ot head off for the time being. Good bye for now and God bless.

What I shared in my journal today are thoughts of a normal human being with the need to vent from time to time and today was one of those days. Good bye!

Author: ksmiley

As a diarist and blogger, please bear with me as I continue to upgrade my blog as time moves forward. Thank you.

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