Breaking Down

have decided to stay home from church today even though I did not want to miss church.  I always love going to church, but sometimes after a long, hard day, and a variety of emotions, it is best to stay home and relax the best I can. After yesterday, dealing with sadness, confusion, laughter, and disappointment, I have come to find myself in the need to take it easy and get comfortable for the day.

I do have to admit that taking time for myself was a very good idea. The only thing I found out today was that I could not sit still and be alone so I called my IRIS worker AR to see if she could come early to take me back to the nail place to get my broken nail fixed and go to Hacienda Real for lunch. We did just that and then came back to my place to have a shower, get into comfortable clothes, and watch a little bit of TV before she left at 4 PM.

From my experiences yesterday with a variety of emotions, I finally broke down and cried. One of the things I need to do is to rely on Jesus more and I have been lately. I know I’ve had a very emotional day yesterday and broke down in tears today, I know that I will be okay in the near future but I never really relied on God/Jesus enough for my bad days. I know Jesus is always here for me but I do need to call on him more. I am somewhat embarrassed because as the Christian I professed to be and do not always practice what I tell others. I tell others to pray about their situation at hand and when I have bad day I don’t follow my own advice. What’s wrong with this picture?

AR is gone for the day now and I am going to get ready for bed and get some rest. Sunday will be here soon enough.

About ksmiley

I feel I am back to journaling once again.
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