Sometimes I Need to Vent Even Though It Is A Good Evening

Good evening.  What a beautiful, fantastic night.  With sundown at 7:06 PM tonight in Wisconsin, I want to say I’ve had a good day. For the past several days, I have been doing my best at creating a spreadsheet for my income and expenses with MS Excel, but my attempts have failed to reconcile with my bank.  I am not giving up and will attempt to get my spreadsheet and bank to show that I can create a spreadsheet. I have the TV turned off to have some quiet time after doing my day’s devotional and because I missed yesterday’s devotional. 

What Happened This Morning 

Please forgive me for what I am about to say, my dear Jesus.  I am here to talk about something that makes my heart feel emotion, and before I go to sleep, I am talking and praying to you. I will not throw my friend JO under the bus or try not to.  What happened this morning was not expected, but with JO, what is said or done can be what is considered said or done anytime. Believe it or not, I wanted to throttle JO for what she said in a text.  I was not thrilled for a little while.  I was not in the best mood. I have spoken to JO about talking to her Mom more than once and why I did, and I  was reminded about it this morning. Does JO forget we have talked about this?  I do not want to be told more than once, nor like being reminded or repeating myself.  I have promised JO, and that promise is and always will be ‘I will not walk away from her.’ I can’t break my promise even though I wanted to scream and cry and tell her how ungrateful she could be.  I held my tongue so that I didn’t retaliate.  I just sat and waited a few minutes before texting again. I want to be a Christian woman people can look up to, and if I retaliate with unkind words, I could be seen as an ungrateful person. 

Whenever JO decides to be ungrateful or moody, that’s when I will give her the deserved space and talk to her another day.  I don’t like dealing with the drama anymore, and I believe JO wants to have drama in her life regularly.  It is like she does it on purpose or hasn’t found how to avoid dramatic situations.  I am 51 years old; JO is in her 40’s.  I can say that I struggled in my 20’s, 30’s, and 40’s about dramatic situations until I found a way to handle life as a grown-up should.  I had to walk away from some friends to do that until I told them why I left them for a while. I have JO, JS, KW, and her husband JW (Who passed away last year) back in my life. We all live in Garden Court today. 

Author: ksmiley

As a diarist and blogger, please bear with me as I continue to upgrade my blog as time moves forward. Thank you.

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