Kristi Karnopp's Diary & Blog

Last night, even though I had to leave early in order to get to bed early, I had watched the L.A. Lakers and Sacramento Kings play in Game #5 on television with my friend “G” and another Teamster Manor Apartment tenant “R”. I only watched the first half of the game because it was going to be late the game ended and I had to get enough sleep to get up early for a doctor’s appointment at 10 a. this morning. While I was watching the game and talking to “R” while “G” watched and made noise – being the excitement that the L.A. Lakers made a two point or three point basket, I was thinking of the high school days that were not too long ago. My grandpa, now ill with Alzhiemer’s Disease and in a nursing home in NM, took me to every Boy’s Basketball game at home. Oh how fun it was to see my high school basketball team win a game almost every time I was present and cheering them on while my grandpa enjoyed the night out with his granddaughter. Never did I realize until last night that I was a basketball game lover and it was not because the guys in uniform were running from one side to the other of the basketball court. I was not into guys who were considered jocks and very important kids of the school. I was yet a girl who went into herself and felt like a loner in high school because many kids would tease me because of my last name and because I was a daughter to a police officer. I had my own group of people, who also felt like loners or not as outgoing as others. Now, to be very honest with you, that group has lost touch with each other – either are now married or moved away to another part of Wisconsin or another state altogether. Where in the world did I go off rambling about being a “loner” when I was talking about the love of basketball?, lol. Now let me get back to the reason for this entry, okay?

In my Junior year in high school, a year later after Grandpa Fox took me to all the home games of the boy’s basketball game, I had become the only manager of the Girl’s Basketball team even though weeks after that I had learned I was terribly sick and needed a kidney transplant. My grades were not manager for the basketball team material but because my parents were seeing that I was trying to come out of my shell as being a person who liked to be home alot, had talked to the basketball coach (Girls) and the team had voted me in to stay as manager that year because I had spirit and I never was banned from the manager position. I had missed many of the games but the basketball coach would tell me how the girls did and when I had a chance to go, I was happy to be with my team and be there for them whether they won or lost. When I had gotten a visit from the coach, who was also my phy ed teacher, came to visit me one day, i had gotten a card from the entire team with get well wishes and happy notes saying that they missed me and yet ewre doing well and wished I was there to enjoy the spirits of their wins.

Now, years later since I have graduated from high school, watching basketball games on television was not one of my favorite things to do —- until one day my friend “G” had asked me to watch a basketball game with him. I had, ever since he has asked me to watch b ballgames with him, I had found the passion of watching b ball games again. Today I am a basketball watcher once again and I am planning on going to my high school basketball home games when they are again in season to cheer the team on. WOW!

I am not going to write a whole lot today because I will be leaving to go watch a basketball game in the community room of our apartment complex with a friend of mine. This is the last time I will be on line for today as well.

I have been working on a piece of writing that deals with my thoughts from yesterdays Memorial Day. Yesterday, in my DD journal I have written something but realized that not everyone here knows me via my journals yet and as soon as I get the chance as well it is finished, I will add the writing as one of my entries. I will have repeated myself to some degree again in the piece of writing but that does not matter. I will probably get it done before the week is out. I have to run for now.

Earlier in my first entry I had mentioned that I was going away for the afternoon in so many words. My mom could not go to the potluck picnic that was being held at church member’s home because of her back and that she had other plans to be elsewhere – more or less staying home. I had gotten a ride from another church member to the potluck picnic and I realized that I had a great time. But let me tell you about it before leaving for the night.

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We had arrived to the house where the potluck was being held and quite a few people had already arrived and been there for a while already. The food was just about to be served and everyone was to eat the good food that people had brought t0 the potluck. As I was walking to the crowd of people, I had noticed that one of the church members was loading powder into a small cannon to fire off. I thought oh no, my ears won’t take the boom that was going to come out of the cannon and I will need to hide somewhere far away from the noisy little cannon. But for a while, due to the wind, the cannon could not be lit and fired. It was during the time I had sat down at a picnic table to eat my plate of food, when the cannon was fired and I had jumped a bit because of the noise but I did not run and hide. I just talked to the people around me and ate my dinner. The noise of the cannon was not so bad but it was LOUD! Then the cannon, a few minutes later, was fired again and I jumped again and continued eating my food on my plate talking to the people around me. I was having a GREAT time but then again the place I was at I always have a good time there at this friend’s house.

My Memorial Day plans outside my home happened kind of at the last minute because I did not know who would be willing to pick me up and take me to the potluck picnic at this church members home. With my mom not well enough to go, I was pretty positive that I was going to be spending the entire Memorial Day at home in my paj/amas taking a nap here and there and watching movies and reading until my eyes were to close for sleep. But I got a ride to the potluck picnic and I had a GREAT time and I was glad to be a part of the party away froom home.

As I was talking to others at the potluck I kept thinking of the people who died for us on September 11th, 2001. I wanted so badly to take a few minutes of my time while sitting at the table eating to write my thoughts for the day – more thoughts other than the first entry I had written earlier today – what I was feeling at the moment but there was time to do so because I was always talking to someone or eating. Many people had shown up this afternoon to the potluck picnic. It turned out to be a beautiful day for the outdoors picnic. I did think, at first, that we were going to have some rain, which would have cancelled the outdoors to indoors but it turned out to a beautiful afternoon all day long. It was a comfortable warm outdoors and the sky was clear and no sign of stormy darkness or signs of rain.

I have to run now.

I had read an Dear Diary entry written by one of the members and what this person wrote had touched my heart. After reading that Dear Diary Entry I had read another entry by another Dear Diary writer that also touched my heart to a degree that brought back the day of September 11 – the day we were attack by terrorists. Today is Memorial Day, this day is a good day to relive and remember September 11 and those who died to keep the freedom of America alive. I do not like war between people or countries but if we have to fight for what we believe in, then I am not against fighting for what we believe in. As a young woman who is disabled with mild case of cerebral palsy, I do take a stand for the rights of the disabled and handicapped. As for the men and women who died to save the entrapped victims of the attack on America, we need to keep them in our prayers and thoughs as those who did die did leave loved ones and friends behind to mourn their losses.

I did think, at first truly, that the planes crashing into the World Trade Center was just an accident and not an act of terrorism, but as the day wore on, I noticed that the news was talking about the attack all day long. At first, which was downright rude of me, I just blew off the attack on America as an accident and I blew it off, but I noticed how serious it was when I kept hearing the radios blastiing around me about the World Trade Center being destroyed by two planes because of the act of Terrorism. After realizing that the act of terrorism had affected many people and it was national and world wide news, I thought of never flying again but my dad and step dad both encouraged me to fly and show the terrorists that I was not afraid and I can go on with my life and I did fly to New Mexico to see my mom and step father and my Flyer Pup Sis. Flyer is a Basengi. My heart did, even though I did take that big step, kept going to those who were lost in the attack trying to save those people who had fallen victim to the attack – innocent or not – and m heart cried for those who left loved ones behind.

Just remembering that day on September 11 has brought the true meaning of Memorial Day to my heart. Reading other entries at Dear Diary has made me realize that Memorial Day is not just to remember those who died in war years ago in WWI & WWII, Vietnam, and Gulf War. Today another war is going on in other countries in order to fend for our freedom and our rights as the United States. I don’t like war but… …I will fight for my rights as an individual who is disabled, etc…

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Well…For now I have to run. I am going to a potluck picnic with three other friends this afternoon and so I need to run. I have typed more today because my right hand is on the mend again and typing is becoming easy again. I still one into problems now and then but they can be overlooked – I type hitting other keys on the keyboard yet but not as often as I did at the very beginning of having a problem with my right hand. I need to take a rest from typing now anyway. I am going to leave today with the words sung by Lee Greenwod that I copied from one of the Dear Diary entries I read earlier today. Let’s see what you think of those words now.

God Bless the America

Lee Greenwood

If tomorrow all the things were gone

I’d worked for all my life,

And I had to start again

with just my children and my wife,

I’d thank my lucky stars

to be living here today,

‘Cause the flag still stands for freedom

and they can’t take that away.

I’m proud to be an American

where at least I know I’m free,

And I won’t forget the men who died

who gave that right to me,

And I gladly stand up next to you

and defend her still today,

‘Cause there ain’t no doubt I love this land

God Bless the U.S.A.

From the lakes of Minnesota

to the hills of Tennessee,

Across the plains of Texas

from sea to shining sea.

From Detroit down to Houston

and New York to L.A.,

There’s pride in every American heart

and it’s time we stand and say:

I’m proud to be an American

where at least I know I’m free,

And I won’t forget the men who died

who gave that right to me,

And I gladly stand up next to you

and defend her still today,

‘Cause there ain’t no doubt I love this land

God Bless the U.S.A.

I did not realize that time had escaped me. I have now, four minutes before time says Monday, Memorial Day. It has been a very good day…weatherwise as well. I got out in the nice weather with two man friends of mine. We went futon shopping…today being window shopping for a futon…and my brown couch is for sale. I need a change.

Again sorry this is so short…

I had gotten a call from my sister in law this afternoon wanting information on my plane and itinerary of my upcoming trip. Hearing her voice on my phone was not a shock but a great joy. It will not be long before I see them and my neices and nephew. This trip has been planned since January.

I am sorry that my entry is going to be short tonight but I am having trouble with my right hand right now and have been since the mid of the week. I don’t know what happened but I do remember leaning on the right arm for a long length of time and it does have a small outer bruise by my elbow. It is very frustrating.

Okay dokey…I thought at first that I was going to have to deal with my right hand being out of commission for a long time. A couple of days ago I had noticed that my right hand was not typing and my fingers kept getting in the way with other keys that I WAS NOT typing. Today, on the verge of recovery, I am able to type again but with some difficulty and my hand being in a different position than what I am used to having it as. I have noticed, however, that I can still type fairly fast with all my fiingers extended instead of bent into a fist except my pointer finger. Honestly, dealing with cerebral palsy all of my life so far, I thought having my right hand out of commission for the past couple of days have been VERY frustrating and pretty annoying if things just don’t work properly or the way you have been used to for so long. I have been typing for many years in one position and maybe my hand just got real tired. My fingers, the ones that are extended other than my pointer finger, do have a tendacy to hit other keys that I don’t want to hit in order to make sense of what I am writing but I always hit other keys I don’t want to type anyway.

Now you know a little bit about me these past couple of days that I haven’t shared yet.

I am a young woman with a mild case of cerebral palsy on he right side and I have been playing Yahoo Games for a coiple of hours tonight. During the time I was playing Pyramids at Yahoo Games, my right hand had fallen asleep. Because I have CP on the right side, I am left handed. Because my right hand had fallen asleep, I am typing this entry with one hand — my left hand — and it is very awkward because I type with all my left and pointer finger on my right — a six-fingered typist is what I am. I CAN NOT use the pointer finger on that hand for the rest of the night and that is very frustrating. Typing with one hand is VERY FRUSTRATING and AWKWARD for me. Sometimes having CP is a pain!

What am I going to do now that school’s out?! I am not confused as to what feelings I have as far as school being out anymore. I am glad school is out and I have things to look forward to but with some of the time I don’t want to get bored to death because I am now not having studies on a daily basis. I do have my books here so I can recap on what I did learn or re-learn what I have learned in my classes and time studying at home, etc…. I guess I have to do the best I can and better get off the school is out deal right now.

This is my last day of school for the summer and twenty minutes from now I have a final exam in Business Law. I am not worried about it since I have taken the time this whole month to study for the final exam and I am pretty excited about getting it done and over with but yet do a good job. I know I can do it and I will do a good job. No test anxiety today! YEAH! Better run for now and get things going.