More Than I Expected

Remember when I mentioned about the break up between my boyfriend and I? Well, on Thursday, the day after the break up did hit me kind of hard physically. I iwas tired all day long and running on empty most of the day. I felt like a fog hit me and Icould not get past the fog unless I was keeping myself going. I managed, yes, but I really felt tired before 7 p.m. and just could not keep ny eyes open. I am glad to know that Doug and I are just friends now but I do wonder how quickly he will find someone else. I remember my last break up before my boyfriend, I did not date anyone for ten months.

What on earth am I worried about my ex-boyfriend’s needs for a girl or no girl? I need to do what I have to/need to for ME! I may be 31 years of age and in want of some “things” in life is different from “needing” things in life. I am a student at a two year college trying to get a life that is very important to me. I have grown up in so many ways that I now know what is very very important to me and what needs to be done in life such as a job that I can do and be proud of. IK need to get my life established and stable and having a “boyfriend” is not the answer right now. I have been looking for “this and that” in life when it comes to things i don’t exactly need yet. It is nice to have a boyfriend, yes, but it is nice to have your own space to come home to after a hard, long, and exciting day. I have to be happy for ME?…

About ksmiley

I feel I am back to journaling once again.
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