I had a great time at church yesterday – and when I came home I called a dear friend out of town to see how she was doing and what she was doing. Upon speaking to this friend, I had learned that her previous breast cancer and removal of her breasts (cancer) had gone to her bones. Upon hearing this newss, I was dumbfounded and struck with a sadness that just would not go away. This very friend, I have known since I was seven years old, is having a benefit in her behalf to help raise money for her bills. Even today, after yesterday evening’s finding out, I don’t know what to think. I don’t want my friend to die from such a horrible disease (cancer). Cancer, known as the big “C” word in people’s mind. This very friend, a woman with two kids – one graduating from college the other graduating this May from high school and if it is God’s will to have this friend die, I feel I may lose a piece of me – and only memories will remain. I have lost loved ones (relatives) die of illness or old age, but the thought of losing this friend is like losing a loved one.
Even though I am saddened by the “bad” news, my friend is strong-willed and understands what is going on in her life. She is a believer in God. I am just not liking what is going on right now, really…even though what is in my friend’s possible future can not be stopped. I just don’t like what is going on that’s all. My heart is defiinitely hurting/aching.
If I can understand that we can not stop the worst things to happen to one’s or your own life and that I accept God’s plans in someone’s or my own life, am I am a “bad” believer in God’s plans?