Just Rambling… ENTRY #1

It has been twenty years since my kidney transplant. The one thing I really do not like doing every month is getting my lab work done to check on my kidney counts because of hassle of getting it done. Ever since my kidney coordinator JTL left for another job, I do have to admit that my new coordinator SL is a sweetheart, friendly, and kind, and I promised her that i would get my labs drawn for her this week. Well those results had come in and my lab results are perfect and my health is in good order and doing well. I do have to admit that it was all worth the hassle for SL and myself, especially with all the flooding that is going on in Janesville right now. The pictures I have seen, from friends who have taken pictures, the flooding in Janesville is pretty bad and I have not heard of the river cresting yet. Scary to be honest with you, especially for those who do live closer or close to the river downtown. Are there enough sandbags out there? Hope everyone is doing okay. I have been in a flooding situation before while visiting relatives and it was one experience that was both scary and awesome at the same time but I knew I was safe and if worst came to worst, my family knew what to do, and for the first time in a long time I was not scared or afraid because I was safe. I always feel safe when I am with my family in PA and in AR.

This week has been a good week for me so when I had gotten the phone call from SL about my lab results being good, I realized how my week ended with her — surprisingly good. After twenty years, my world of health has been very good and I considered myself blessed. Let’s work towards another 20 years, okay?! We shall see what God has in mind for me.

I am a little nervous about this coming Saturday in Milwaukee. I know I will be okay and being nervous is normal, but not knowing other people who are graduating with me Saturday, is just something I am not sure about. I have my cheering section and that cheering section means a lot to me but I am not worried about that at all or getting there. It is after getting there that I am not sure about. Treading on new territory always gives me the paranoid and scared look on my face just like the first and last day of school when I was in high school. I have had my high school graduation 19 years ago and now I will be having my college graduation. I can not believe it, still to this day, that I made it in college and finished, when I do remember not being successful at Blackhawk Technical College (BTC) between Janesville and Beloit. I can not believe that I have made it, even to this day, it is a thought that surprises me yet. YIKES! I DID IT! Wait a minute, does it include me? I have KW to thank for that one because she did not give up; on me when at the time I did give up on myself. WHOA!

I can not believe the time has gone by so quickly. I have been able to sleep in my bedroom, on the futon, every night since Sunday night, and it has been a good feeling sleeping in my bedroom again. I feel normal again. Even my case worker at IDS said that I seem chipper and happy today and yesterday when I called — only through message of course. We talked for the second time this week today since we saw each other on Monday at my counseling appointment with PS. My medication for depression and anxiety has bee working better even though I do have troubles sleeping sometimes yet again. My schedule has changed slightly since Sunday night, too. My television does not get turned on until 3 p.m. or so in the afternoon now so I can concentrate on other things like my computer, writing, reading, crosswords, or playing my hand held Wheel of Fortune. I do all my reading and such in my bedroom. I even go to my bedroom after 9 p.m. every night … silly as it sounds to read before retiring for the night or write. I am even on my computer less during the day too, except for today I have already been on it for 3 hours straight with a phone call or two in between coming in and I making calls out. It is just happening a little differently. I do not know what to think about all this yet, but I am doing okay. It feels great to have a living room back as a living room again and not just a bedroom. I will sleep in the living room when I have company though, but the bedroom is MINE, lol.

Gotta run!