What Has Been On My Mind Lately!!

Why do the most gorgeous men have to be such jerks?

Seriously, MW, a gentleman who lives in this building is one handsome man who is is going to be in his 70s this year. Unfortunately, MW is a jerk, though. He can be very unkind and mean to others, and he is very mean to LS at times. In fact, true or not, I have heard that MW does not want LS hanging around him at all. He does not like her because she is not very bright and unkind herself at times. She just does not get it that he does not her around him but she bugs him so much. I have not had a major problem with MW myself but I do not like hanging around him or LS because I have seen how he treats LS and how she sometimes treats MW. The relationship they have does not really exist but it does to LS and it is a volatile. They are perfect for one another in my way of thinking.

Why can she not get it that her “man-friend” is abusive and does not want her hanging around?

MW and LS have a relationship that really does not exist but it does exist with LS. I just do not get the idea, as observant as I am, why LS does not get the fact that MW does not want her hanging around him. He does not like her at all because she is not very bright and so overweight that it is grotesque and it bothers him to the point it makes him sick. That is the mean part of him I have found out and have known for a very long time. LS is somewhat mentally disabled and she is taking advantage of MW and hangs around him everyday without giving him a break from her at all these days. They are always together and never do I see MW alone anymore. She just does not get it to leave him alone. I do not hang around LS anymore because of her constantly hanging with MW who does not want nothing to do with her. AARRGG!!

Is my friendship with CSE a friendship I should consider keeping?

I get so frustrated with CSE so often – daily as a matter of fact. I still believe her moving into the building – in her case moving back into the building – was a big mistake and something of a mistake on the property and onsite management but it is their problem and not mine…thank goodness! She is constantly late coming down to my place and never on time for anything as far as I am concerned. The fact that she did not pay rent for two months because she was unwise in getting a %600 computer and not able to pay her rent for two months along with her other bills that were necessary. I think it was the mistake of management for allowing her to pay back her two months rent in installments. She even, without asking permission from management first, got a kitten – now a cat. My friendship with her does not seem right anymore. I just do not know what to do with CSE anymore. Something is not right about her. We used to be great friends but that greatness is no more. Ever since May 30th I have found myself unsure of a lot of things about her lately that I cannot explain or dare to here online. Is she ill? From talking to my surrogate mom NMS, it sounds like she is not well mentally like she used to be when we first met. That is why I believe CSE’s relationship with her ex-husband and new wife is so very unhealthy, and I believe he has had a hand in her illness. I really should not be a part of CSE’s life if she has problems like she does anymore. i do not feel right hanging around her. The argument and screaming match I had with her on May 30th proves my point.

I Do Understand MW

Even though MW is not very nice about LS and has said some really nasty things about her. Yesterday I saw him in the community room waiting for her, I has asked him if he was waiting for LS and he told me “I suppose so and I did tell LS to be down by 11 a.m.. They were going to their free lunch at the Salvation Army and MW was waiting. By his tone of voice and knowing that he does not really care for LS at all. I do understand how he feels even though he is very mean to her behind her back. I do not laugh with him or at the idea of her being mean to LS behind her back but I do have to admit that she is not a pleasant person to hang around everyday either. She has been mean to me several times as well. Our friend, EW… God rest her soul, would have put a stop to LS’s relationship with MW if she was alive today and still with us but she passed away from her cancer returning September 2008. EW is greatly missed! I believe MW’s world is very complicated at times. I do understand even though I do not appreciate his attitude towards LS at all, how MW feels. I believe I empathize with him, I think. I do not sympathize…I do not think anyway…maybe I do sympathize and empathize when it comes to MW even though, as handsome as he is, is a big jerk.

Not Anymore…Any!

I know I have said this plenty of times during my venting phases… I am no longer going to be asking for CSE’s help anymore. If she comes down to my place on her own from now on, fine, but I m not going to ask her to come down anymore. This time I am going stop asking for CSE’s help. She is back to be late all the time, her lies, and hiding things from me, beating her laptop and mouse in my home with her knowing I do not appreciate it greatly. I get stressed out when she does that. She can get online in her own apartment using my modem – having the password – so her needing to have her computer down here is not necessary anymore. She can do her research on family stuff in the privacy of her home. I am seriously thinking about changing my password on my modem anyway. She needs to get her own internet provider from now on and leave her computer home. Her computer mouse is broke now because her cat chewed the cord into two and she knows her cat chews on cords! Her choices in her world have been very unwise lately. I used to be good friends with her in the past before she got married but she has changed a lot since then and has been divorced for a long time now from a man who has had an affair with another woman while he was married to CSE…that’s why I think her ex is a very shady person and someone not to trust fully. I can not believe that she has him in her life today and he comes into this building and I have been dissed by her 4 times now because of him and his urgency to see her right then and there and calling her to let her know he is ten minutes away from the building. He is a nasty piece of work these days and was when I first met the creep. I did not even approve CSE’s marriage to him but because she was my close friend, I did not say anything. I sensed and smelled a rat from day one they met! I really do hate this six sense of mine sometimes! AARRGG!!!

Yucky!

I am beginning to feel my hormones beginning to rage and feel my monthly coming. YUCKY! I feel bloated and gross now and see an ugly person in the bathroom mirror instead of a beautiful gal. AARRGG!! I am glad I get my monthlies on time but I do have to admit I hate having my monthlies! LOL… I do not even tolerate them very well either, lol… AARRGG!!

More later…gotta go and play my games on my Facebook for a while now before KH comes and helps me with my shower for the day.

About ksmiley

I feel I am back to journaling once again.
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