My Afternoon

Okay, my morning went just fine. Now… my afternoon has a little bump in it and now CSE and I are having an issue. She had come down here to get the key to go check on Oreo and then bring it back. She then proceeds to tell me that she has been running back and forth about keeping or getting rid of her cat Ethan, and I told her as high strong as Ethan is and how well he does not behave or listen to her, it would probably be best to find a different home for him where his freedom is a lot bigger. Then I proceeded to, wrong wording of course, and have been trying to work things out with CSE ever since she walked out of here so fast without a word that indicated she was upset with me or plain upset about the idea of either keeping or getting rid of Ethan, tell her that I did not want to hear anymore about Ethan. I have texted her and called her to please call me back to resolve the issue between us but she has ignored both so far at this time, and I proceeded to tell her if she does not call to resolve the issue betwee us, she was not welcome down here anymore today. I have, not telling her of course, been thinking, about her attitude lately and how much of it does not need to be in my life anymore. I am very close to deleting her out of my life once more and this time for good without any getting back to our friendship. It has not been the same ever since she has been back living in the same building I live in. She has changed considerably since 1998 when we first met and became real good friends. I see we are not good friends anymore. Her issues are so noticeable and her lies, hiding the truth, and being secretive is not, in my way of thinking and my life personally, very healthy and CSE needs help professionally before she is really allowed to be in my life again. I have spilled my heart out to her and told her many things and her reaction back about some of the things I have shared with her have been totally abnormal reactions and her showing no sympathy to me has disappeared from my world all together. She is NOT the same girl I met in 1998. Her life seems all screwed up in my way of thinking. Here I wonder why I have ever reconnected with CSE anyway. She is not stable. Here I am going to a counselor ever two to three weeks to resolve what issues I deal with in my world and life to keep myself from going totally insane in my chaotic world. CSE denies the help she does need for herself and leaves her chaotic world is more chaos then ever. Her going back and forth about keeping her cat Ethan or giving him up has run across her mind more than once and I have heard about it so many times now that it has become countless now. I am sick and tired of hearing about Ethan not being a good cat,. always chewing on things he should not be chewing on – cords and items that are valuable to CSE and important cords such as cables for the television or computer. I have gotten sick and tired of hearing about how her computer works and does not work. Now her USB ports do not work properly and are not working half the time. That is what happens when you beat up on your computer sooner or later. I do not care if I ever hear from CSE anymore today or any day after today. I really want her out of my life until she admits she has a problem with her world. I am still in disagreement about her changing her name from CKR to CSE anyway… she has walked away from her past life and now it is catching up with her and her world is spinning out of control. I no longer want to be in her world anymore. She is a very sick lady and needs professional help before she is even welcome into my world ever again. She should not have moved back into the building I live in. She has really disrupted my world and a few others with her so-called antics and issues. I wish she was not here at all. Her world is all messed up. I admit that my world is messed up but I am getting help from doctors, counselors, and other professional people in my world. I am beginning to really hate CSE more and more every. After today, she is not ever going to be late coming down because she is not going to be … no longer welcome here in my home until she gets help from a doctor or counselor, or both. Good bye CSE! You are out of my life for good now. GET HELP OR STAY AWAY FROM ME!!!! YOU HAVE MORE PROBLEMS THAN YOU WILL EVER ADMIT. GOOD BYE AND HAVE A NICE LIFE YOU LITTLE BITCH! HOW DARE YOU WALK OUT OF MY HOME THE WAY YOU DID, BITCH!!!! YOU NEED TO STOP AND THINK OF HOW YOU HANDLE THINGS AND HURT PEOPLE IN THE PROCESS! YOU BITCH!!!!

About ksmiley

I feel I am back to journaling once again.
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