Now that I am home and in relax mode, I feel there seems to be a trigger in my thought process enough to wonder about something. Someone I got to know in the early 2000s was on dialysis for the past two years and decided to end the treatment to die a month late from the toxins that developed during that time. When AM was alive, she always talked about the pain she was having. I understand now. I deal with pain, but it is after dialysis. AM was doing peritoneal dialysis while I am doing hemodialysis. Also, I have pain from tight muscles from CP, and I can no longer walk well without my leg brace and shoes. I will endure the pain and continue to move the best I can on a day that is not my best. I will still have a smile on my face for the people in my life. For AH, her decision to stop dialysis was her call; it was a hard pill to swallow at first. It was her choice, and her choice she had her reasons, and she spoke to Jesus about her decision.