Morning Thoughts

I was so tired yesterday that I did have a couple of naps during the day after JP left after noon. JP surprised me because she said she was coming over today. She came back with candy and cookies, and cream fudge for me. I do have to admit that she had me a little confused for a few minutes. I am glad she is back, and I get back on track with my routine and schedule. Having DH here was fantastic, but with her busy schedule, we had a different routine scheduled for the last two weeks. I managed to get things done, as each caregiver I have had throughout the past seven years has different ways of doing things. Change, and I have conflicts sometimes unless I have time to prepare for the change or changes ahead of time. I find change very hard at times, depending on what is changing in my life in the short or long term. I have had trouble with change since I was a teenager. 

With that said, I have to say the DH is a keeper as a caregiver. Although it differed from JP’s, I found the routine not inadequate. I want her to work for me again when JP is not here when I need a hand. I want to admit that with JP returning, I was getting a little anxious as her vacation ended and she was heading home. Getting back into the routine has been thought of since my caregiver JP left and changed my routine for two weeks. 

I am glad that my routine is getting back to normal. My place is shaping up slowly after being here since October 1, 2021. My kitchen table is lovely after JP took care of its clutter. My birthday gifts have been put in places throughout the living room. Garden Court has in-house inspections this week, and I am unsure if management will choose my apartment because the people I call “the big wigs” will be inspecting apartments. Management does not know. Since I moved in October 2021, this will be my first inspection since I moved here. I hope my apartment passes inspection. I am a bundle of nerves. 

With my schedule back on track this week, I am dealing with emotions settling down slowly but surely. I must remember to take deep breaths, sit back, and allow God to help me. I cannot do this on my own—without God’s help. 

Dear Jesus, 

Please help my emotions settle down as I get back into a routine. I know I need you. Amen 

Time to Go for Now 

I have to go to dialysis this morning, and it is almost time for me to return later today if I am not tired from treatment. 

About ksmiley

I feel I am back to journaling once again.
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