New Year’s Eve Thoughts



My thoughts are not on New Year’s parties or staying up late until midnight to see the New Year roll in. I am not going to have a houseful of guests this year. I am having dinner with my friend Richard shortly and then pizza with my friend Catie later this evening…if I am still hungry. the roast in the crock pot smells yummy and delicious! I can not wait until Richard gets up here to eat with me. I think, after dinner, if Richard does not mind, I am going to have some time to myself before Catie comes up so I can unwind somewhat. After yesterday’s feelings of anxiety, I just need some breathing room before I get bombarded with a whole lot of questions and words from Catie. I am not really, truly, in the mood to have a whole lot of company period today. I felt, after yesterday’s fiasco, I was spreading myself thin and tempermental today!!!! More later!!!

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DISCONNECTION!



Okay doke, when did I get disconnected from the internet? It never happened before! Anyway, it is the first time that it is has happened. LOL…I could HAVE disconnected myself accidently too…who knows. I CAN’T REMEMBER anyway!

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Anixety HIT!

Anxiety hit tonight and the dratted tears rolled down my cheeks at a relatively good speed. HORRIBLE! A lot of thought on my platter today I guess…who knows! I could not sort it all out well. I kept bouncing to and fro on a couple of issues that really borhered me most. Those issues being about my friend Catie and how my friend Richard feels about her directly, and the fact that I did not get an answer knocking at another friend’s door until she has told me by the third knock that she was not wanting company right now. Why did she not say so on the first knock is what bothered me the most! I do not understand that about some people. I think I would have done it differently but by the sound of my friend’s voice on the oter side of the door, I could see why she did not answer the door until the third or fourth knock. I do not know how many times I knocked anyway…

About my friend Catie…I am not sure if I am beginning to feel drained here! My friend Richard will not do anything with Catie and will not come between Catie and me, but he does not feel comfortable around her. I understand that. I did not feel comfortable around her at first either but after getting to know her, she seemed to be an okay person just like many other people. I have known Catie for a long time now. I know Catie is a special person with special needs and so on. She is a nice person even though she can be sometimes annoying but she is so lovable and so sweet. Who couldn’t be annoying? I know I can be sometimes…BELIEVE ME! Oh well…anyway…Catie’s Catie and always will be Catie. A good person she is.

Anyway, my anxieties have now left me and I am now getting relaxed and ready for tomorrow. I hope none of the plans tomorrow backfire! I had enough anxiety today – truly and honestly.

What a day this day was. I was fine most of the day until Richard and I sat down to dinner at Perkin’s but then anxiety was beginning to creep in before that. I still feel the feeling of anxiety and that sometimes feels worse than the anxiety attacks themselves. When I got home from being with Richard, I was confused and crying and not sure what was going on in my life. My life is sometimes so complicated even when it is not really complicated. I am one person who is who she is…ME!

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My Day Away From Home Again

TOday was another day of gallabatting with my friend Richard. We went to Beloit, WI this afternon after brunch and tried to do a couple of things. After we got back from Beloit, we stopped at Perkin’s for supper and then we stopped at Woodman’s to get groceries (I needed more groceries than he did really), and we DID NOT get home until 8:30 p.m. this evening. What a day…it was nice for gallabatting around.

Richard is a 59 year old man who lives in Teamster Manor Apts and he has finally gotten a car (used) to drive around in so now he feels mobile and happy. What a guy!

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Didn’t I Just Update My Antivirus Program?

It just seems that on Friday I had updated my antivirus program and now today it needs to be updated again. EEK, didn’t I just update the program four days ago? Anyway, since I was gone on the farm up norh on the 25th, I could not update the antivirus program until Friday when I got home. LOL Anyway, it is now updated again today and I am doing another virus scan even though I have already done it this morning about 10:15 a.m. No big deal as long as I am protected from infection of any kind of virus. So far so good. Yeah. My antivirus program did pick up on an e-mail that had an infected file and it was immediately quarantined in the vault and immediately deleted. I know now that my antivirus program works! YES!

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Just Gabbing



I really do not know what to really say tonight at the hour of 10:10 p.m. Sunday night. I have been on line chatting with my friend Beth off and on and having a good time just being on line. When I looked at my grades on line at the school’s site, I was so excited to find that I had gotten a 3.0 GPA this semester, I was so HAPPY and EXCITED, and all the anxiety had all of a sudden disappeared almost totally. I am beginning to feel a little tired now with all the excitement I had all day long and all the anxiety I had since school ended for the semester. That is now OFF my mind, YEAH…thank goodness!

A New Idea For 2003!

My friend Velvetdazzle has really made my journal look pretty and now with 2003 just around the corner, 3 days away…I am going to do something a little bit different. I am going to keep the look that velvetdazzle created for me, but what I am going to write about will be a little bit different. I am finding myself somewhat bored with what I write about at times so I am sitting here wondering what to do to write about things other than myself. I have a pet journal now, a personal journal here, a school journal, and a story journal. I could not accummalate anymore diaries as I do now have everything separated,. Oh yeah, I also have a Sabbath keeping journal as well. I have everything under the sun now! This journal, which you are reading now, is my personal journal. So really I do not have to spice it up any further do I? If I have a boring day or a boring journal entry, so what, right? RIght! A new idea for 2003? No, I do not know, and I really can not think that far ahead right now, LOL. It is getting late and I did have a full day in and out of my place all day, and I now I am too tired to even really think clearly…LOL. Good night for now. Bye!

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This Semester



I looked at my grades on the internet on the school’s website and I have a 3.0 this semester! YEAH! Current GPA is 3.0, cumulative is 2.0 and overall is 2.0.

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Tired Now



My world this afternoon is now feeling worn out and tired. Richard and I got home for the day about 2:30 p.m. or so and now he is watching a football game and I am at my place about to fall asleep at the computer…LOL I am watching FBI Files on the Discovery Channel nn Cable and I am about to get nestled on the bed with my cat who is right now paying attention to me and wanting attention paid to her. What a cat! I will be back later.

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Time With My Friend Richard



Breakfast

I had gotten a call from my friend Richard this morning saying that we were going to go out for breakfast this morning. We went to Perkins and had the same brunch of two eggs with cajun steak on english muffin, hashbrowns, and cranberry muffin. He had coffee and I had chocolate milk and water with lemon. Breakfast was delicious! It was tasty and so good that I know what I am going to order again when I go to Perkins for breakfast again..that’s for sure…YUMMY!

Shoppin’ at the Goodwil Store

After breakfast at Perkins, Richard and I went to the Goodwill store to look around. I found a platter with a New Mexico map on it, and a electric can opener. He bought a shirt, a lamp with a shade, a tray/platter, a cutting board-plastic, a sink board, a telephone, an AC adapter, and some pan and pot covers, and a silver tray. We had looked at tapes and CD’s and books as well but it was not to my taste of items after a while. We spent an hour and a half in the store and found some neat bargains…that’s for sure! I like the store enough to get what I need if it is there. The only thing about any store like the Goodwill or thrift store, is you are not always sure if things work properly after purchase but I guess that is a risk you have to take. I do not always like shopping in those kind of stores unless I really have to but this time I found something I could use – an elelctric can opener, which does work fine for me. I tried it immediately when I got home and plugged it in and opened up a can of fruit cocktail. It worked fine anyway.

Richard’s “New” Car!

We had to be back in time for him to watch a football game, which is somethiing I am not interested in really, I did, with the time allotted, we had a good time together. It was our first venture gallabatting around because he had just bought a real nice car from one of our neighbors here in the building who is going to move out soon. Richard likes to be mobile and be able to get around so when he bought the car, he promised me a ride as soon as he could get his “old” car fixed or get a “newer” one. His “old” car is not yet totally fixed but since our neighbor was selling his car, Richard plunged into business and got the car for $2000. It is a Grand Marquis (Sp) The car itself is over ten years old and is in great shape. The previous owner, Arlin S. and his wife Dorothy, really took good care of it! It’s in GREAT shape and real nice. Anyway, it runs nice and it is big and spacious and Richard is a careful driver. Never ride in a vehicle without wearing a seat belt today. It is not safe! It is dangerous…and we got home safely without any troubles getting to and from place to place.

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Just Chatting



Not much is happening right this minute but I did chat with my friend Beth on Yahoo tonight for a while. Today was a good day. About eight o’clock this evening, I felt the lateness of the night when really timewise it was not at all really late. I hate daylight savings time…yuck! When time springs forward again, I will be much happier. Anyway, I had a good time chatting with Beth. I hope she feels better soon as our conversation was cut off because she got to feeling crummy. I had the flu some time back and I am glad I am over it now. I had no choice really…I had school to finish up and now I am waiting patiently for my grades to arrive or be seen on line. i think, now that it is going on 9 p.m., I am going to say good night and come back tomorrow.

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